Samma Ajiva, the right livelihood

fortunate
(in so many other ways, but also)
to be young enough to be able to make the choice
and wise enough to know which path to choose

funny how the philosophical meanderings can become such concrete options sometimes.

Being a global nomad

... it took me 6 months to buy plates, and only because it bothered someone i was dating that we were eating out of bowls.
... i might never buy curtains
... football/hockey/baseball teams etc? *shrug*
... for every purchase there is always the counter question of whether i would bring it along for the next move
... my sugar is still kept in an asparagus jar
... i normally have 4 kinds of teas and two kinds of coffees, for guests as much as myself because it makes me feel at home
... i don't want to do the goodbyes again, but that is no doubt the nature of the beast....

stay or leave

If you put everything into something, and it doesn't grow then you need to leave.
But it has to be wholehearted.
The hard thing is the time aspect... and how much it has to grow.
But if you give everything then you know for sure when enough is enough

* Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.--Hardy D. Jackson

bad mood

no romance didn't die
because it's always been dead
i was just a fool to think otherwise

redefining L-O-V-E

In light of the statements below, I propose the following statement of Love:

it's possible to pull with someone in the same direction
have an understanding and respect for their life and person
to actively enourage the freedom to be their greatest self
and no less, to actively encourage oneself the freedom to grow

---

there is enough time and romantic relationships can be worth it
it doesn't need or have to be hard
and if you stop moving for a while they're a lot easier to form
after all sedentary people live a very different kind of life

The Mad Ship (Liveship Traders trilogy) Robin Hobb
on how giving up oneself and freedom relates to love
or the difficulties of relationships where you pull together towards a common goal

"to love another person like that, you have to admit that his life is as important as yours. harder still, you have to admit to yourself that perhaps he has needs you cannot fill, and that you have tasks that will take you far away from him. it costs loneliness and longing and doubt and -"

stay?

who would have thought.

lead by example

watching you play i realized just how much the faith and patience of a teacher can give a student. and i remember my teachers. and i remember thinking, that perhaps the noblest thing we can do is teach by example.

we spoke about lost values, attention spans, and disproportionate rewards. this could well be the biggest task ahead of us.

i don't have the luxury of loosing who i am, the price was higher than i ever though imaginable.

but there was something else.
but then there is so much. there always is.